Almost

We are almost weaned. We haven't nursed since Wednesday. Thursday at nap time Emma asked to nurse but I refused her for the first time. I tried to explain that there was no more mommy milk and instead I would cuddle her and read her stories. She was ok, she didn't cry or protest. She just made a pouting face and said "aw". But she hasn't been sleeping well since then at all. She has woken up the last 3 nights about 3am, crying and very upset. She doesn't ask to nurse but I think she is upset, but just doesn't know how to explain herself. And Friday night and Saturday night she has been asking to nurse at bedtime. She doesn't get upset but she does pout her lip and slightly whine a bit. I am trying to give her lots of extra cuddles but I have no idea what she is thinking and I'm afraid that I'm doing some silent psychological damage to her. Maybe I am surprised that she's not crying or protesting when I refuse her. But the not sleeping and crying at night just has me worried.

I don't know if I am doing the right thing. I miss it and I know she does too. But I really don't think I have any milk left and it hurts a lot to nurse. My breasts don't seem to be engorged so that's good. I just feel so sad about it, but I feel like it's been 4 days so we should keep going. I think I'm mostly sad because it means she really is growing up and she's not my baby anymore. If she had protested even the slightest bit more or asked repeatedly, I would have probably given in. Who knows, tomorrow I may cave. If she cries or asks repeatedly at nap time I might. I know this process can be a bit back and forth, so it wouldn't mean we were going back to everyday. I am trying to remember everything about Wednesday, April 21, in case that really was the last time we nursed.

Albino bluebonnet

There were about six in a small area along the service road in West,
Tx. This one was the prettiest and fullest of the six.

Nursing while Pregnant

I'm almost 16 weeks now! Emma is still nursing at nap time, but has begun to skip some days here and there. I think we are getting closer to weaning. Honestly I could probably just tell her no and she'd be mostly fine, I think. I may have to do this soon, as it is starting to hurt to nurse. The first 12 weeks were not a problem, but now I'm really sore. The right side is worse than the left, but I'm still alternating sides each time we nurse.

I'm also feeling the baby move quite a bit now. It's mostly flutters, but I know it's the baby. I feel like I have just gotten off a roller coaster, and my stomach is doing flips. It's really unsettling and still makes me nauseous. I hope as the baby gets bigger the flutters will go away and I'll just feel regular baby movements. I don't remember being so affected by the movements with Emma once I was past 16 weeks.

I'm finally starting to show a bit. My maternity pants are still too big, but regular pants are too tight. So I've been wearing yoga pants for weeks now. Also, I'm back from an A cup to a C cup, in just about 4 weeks. That was fast!

Blooms!

My ajuga is blooming!

Sunshine kitty

Weaning Update

I think Emma is almost weaned. She has not nursed for a significant amount of time since last Wednesday, March 3rd. Last week we did our normal naptime routine, with her nursing to sleep. Then on Thursday we went to West to visit my parents. I tried to get her to take her usual nap in the afternoon by laying down with her and offering her the breast. She latched on and nursed for maybe a minute, but then stopped. She was too excited to be at Grandmom's and Granddad's house to nurse. After a few hours my mom was able to get her to take a nap, but she just wasn't interested in nursing.

On Friday I tried again several times to nurse her at nap time. She latched on a few times, nursed for 5-10 seconds, then would stop. On Saturday it was the same story, she would latch on and nurse for a few seconds but that's all.

On Sunday I didn't even offer her the breast because we were driving back to Austin and she napped in the car. So today I was very interested to see how things would go. After I picked her up from Mother's Day Out, we played for awhile. I asked if she wanted to nap or to nurse and she said no. I thought about just taking her into her room, to the rocking chair but I didn't. After an hour of playing she was really tired and pretending to nap on the floor. I again offered her to nurse or take a nap and she said no. I then asked if she wanted to watch TV in our bed, and she did. I turned the TV on and within about 10 minutes she was asleep. Without nursing. She had a nice 1.5 hour nap on our bed.

So maybe she is weaned? Maybe tomorrow she'll want to nurse? Now I have to decide if I offer it to her or not. Maybe she's really ready to wean and if so that is ok. I'm a little sad about it. I just love her so much and love the close relationship we've had nursing for over two years. If she is truly done then I'm glad it's her final choice. I did make the decision to cut back a few times over the last 8 months, but if she's really done then I'm happy it's her choice.

Abby's Wand

Here is the wand I made for Emma. It did not turn at all how I wanted, but I just lost my creativity when it came time to sit down and make it. I covered the dowel rod and the stars with a soft light pink fabric and glued it on. Then I glued a ribbon to the top. Emma didn't seem very impressed with it and has hardly played with it. Maybe she'll like it better when she's older. I also realized that this looks nothing like Abby Cadabby's wand on Sesame Street. Maybe I'll try to make another wand that looks like Abby's, but not right now.